I am trying my best to not shut down completely because I know that we can’t find someone to explore with if we do not put our whole selves out there. We all deserve a pleasurable existence that prevents harm from happening in the first place. What does it take for all of us to reach this point, you ask? I don’t know.

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The muscles of my legs and thighs spoke of my 125 beats per minute pace in all aspects of my life. My shoulders, upper back and neck groaned and crunched up from carrying so many projects and initiatives. But we all eased into the tensions and came out better for it with regards to all the ways in which I show up in movement culture in the city. The intimacy that I’m rediscovering in my physical form is allowing me to do a similar scan of the scene and I’ve noticed something across the board.

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Finding freedom and liberation in naming that I cannot show up the way that folks have expected me to allows me to be seen and held without physically being held and seen. When I list out things that I need and hope to accomplish on the giant 3M posters in my room, when I color code my Google Calendar, when I take a breath to name and honor my needs by interpreting the languages of my body, mind and spirit - I am able to stay true to my name. What I've written is read with clarity and not much is left up for clarification or debate.

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